Crushing Metal and Strange Twitter Mashups
Featuring Bather, Sidus, Miley Cyrus and... Kenneth Copeland?
A quick disclaimer, the newsletters for December are likely to be a bit shorter as most bands are done releasing stuff for the year. Plus I’m working on my own year end lists for this letter which is more time intensive than one might imagine. But not to worry, there’s still plenty to talk about in the world of music from this week. Before we dive in though, I’d like to discuss something with you.
I’ve always listened to albums in an abnormal fashion, which is to say I listen to a boatload of records constantly and (almost) never skip songs or albums. This past year, I got a new job where my primary focus is writing. Moving away from the constant stream of meetings that being a project manager required allowed me to listen to music almost constantly while working. It’s part of what made this newsletter possible. But I’d be lying if I said every album I listen to was worth my time. There are dozens of albums from this year that I absolutely loathe, I choose not to discuss them because 1. I’d rather talk about good music and lift up bands that deserve it 2. Discussing bad albums would require me to listen to things I don’t like more than once.
As someone who fancies themselves a “music critic” or at the very least, a music guy, it makes sense for me to listen to bad albums all the way through. But does it make any sense for people who aren’t as invested in the music world. Personally, I come down on the side of yes. There are countless records that have made a poor impression on me within the first few songs only to wholly redeem themselves later. Groups like Incendiary and Typhoon would probably be something that got shuffled to the waste bin of my brain rather than something that sits on my shelf.
All that said, it’s really just a calculation. How much do you care about finding new music? How much are you willing to endure? Do you care if your taste is solely curated by you or informed by someone else with more time on your hands? There’s not a wrong answer, but if you’ve never listened through an album you hate, I suggest giving it a shot at least once. At worst you’ll get a sense of triumph and finality, at best you’ll find an album you end up loving. But no matter what, you’ll know where you stand.
If listening to bad albums still seems like too much of a chore, I’ve got good news for you. We have a playlist full of all the best metal, it’s right below this paragraph. Click on it, follow it, love it, dedicate yourself to sharing the gospel of Apotheosis, the old gods demand it.
ALBUM OF THE WEEK
Bather - Phantom Guilt
If there’s one thing in metal that always gets me hyped, it’s when a guitar chug hits me right in the lower intestine. Honestly if running to the bathroom isn’t the first thing you do when a band steps on stage then what was the point of even showing up? Bather clearly went to the same school of metal thought that I did, but they must have been in advanced placement while I was futzing around in remedial classes, because this album whips.
At first I was tempted to label this doom metal. The slow chug and brutal drop-tuned instruments definitely gave that vibe at the front of album opener “Suffer More.” But just as quickly as they bludgeon you in the face with a dose of Electric Wizard inspired riffage, they move straight into a black metal inspired tremolo and even a crushing metalcore style breakdown. It even has touches of death metal at times. It’s somehow still the first song, only two minutes have gone by and we’re working on our third genre. This is operating on a different level than just about all other metal. Oh and to close it out they drop in some clattering bass dragged straight from the mildew drenched basement of sludge metal.
Each song follows a similar pattern, though they are no more predictable for it. Not a single second on this album does anything less than shatter traditional expectations of metal. But instead of letting it destroy them, they wield it like an automatic shotgun. Phantom Guilt is Bather hoisting that weapon high and blindly firing. Somehow they manage to hit every single target.
Great Metal from this Week
Nothing this week crossed the magical 8/10 threshold but we’ve once again got a solid lineup of metal that is more than worth your attention. Of these, I was especially impressed with the albums from Sidus and Domo, which were both competing with the Bather record for album of the week. Be sure to give those a listen, or take this chance to follow our playlist so you can pick and choose your favorites each week.
“Let’s Wrap This Up”
As I’m sure you all know, Spotify has unveiled their new approach to the wrapped feature. Being a user of Spotify, I admit to loving this feature despite hating the business practices of Spotify. The new approach to it, allegedly designed by an intern (which is a violation of labor laws I may remind you) is extremely cool and comprehensive. Everyone loves to talk about how good their music taste is, or dunk on themselves for having embarrassing taste, it’s a genius marketing strategy.
So instead of focusing on a piece of merch (don’t worry, we’ll return to merch and label highlights soon, there’s even some new goodies cooking) I’d like to invite you to share your Wrapped with the class. Here’s my top songs playlist. Take a look, mock me, praise me, but make sure to drop yours in the comments so we can all pass judgement.
“GET BEHIND ME SATAN! I’M ABOUT TO OPEN THIS PIT UP.”
In the interest of giving us all a laugh, enjoy watching noted grifter and silicone faced madman Kenneth Copeland give a rousing, scientifically and ethically questionable prayer to some excellent guitar work from Andre Antunes.
This is legitimately better than about half of the metal I listen to each week. It also made me cackle, so you get a nice two-for-one deal on this. If you’re more impressed by the instrumental skill than the comedy, you can check out the YouTube page of the guitarist by clicking the button below.
Non-Metal AOTW
Miley Cyrus - Plastic Hearts
Look, in general retreads are kind of embarrassing. To me, it indicates a lack of innovation on the part of the artist performing the retread and often doesn’t measure up to the original musical movement. But there are exceptions, rare as they may be, and Miley Cyrus is certainly one of them.
Being only slightly younger than Cyrus, I’ve had the opportunity to watch her career my whole life, and what a ride it’s been. She’s experienced the highest of highs (a TV show named after her alter-ego, “Party in the USA,” “Wrecking Ball”) and the lowest of lows (I’ll never understand what she was going for with Miley Cyrus & Her Dead Petz or her Bangerz era performance at the VMA’s) but regardless of the peaks and valleys, it always felt like she hadn’t found her soul since 2009’s The Time of Our Lives. Listening to Plastic Hearts (a record that I embarrassingly thought would be a covers record) it’s clear that she finally found it.
Plastic Hearts finds Cyrus in her element. The aesthetic of the record leans more Bangerz era than anything else, and you can feel the fingerprints of that era all over this record. But what she does is tamp down the embarrassing urge to tilt to hip-hop (hip-hop is fine, just not for Miley Cyrus, though “23” bangs and you can’t convince me otherwise) and instead tilts toward the femme punk of the 70s and the grunge of the 90s. The resulting record feels genuine in its influences and opens up the space once again, proclaiming it a fertile ground for musical innovation. Plastic Hearts may not be a modern classic, but it feels like the start of something bigger than Cyrus herself. And there’s a lot of value to sparking off a brand new movement.
Runner-up
The Best Best of The Year List (Outside of Ours of Course)
As mentioned in multiple places this newsletter and as one of the primary features of last newsletter, list season is upon us. Most places don’t have theirs out yet, but a few have jumped the gone and gone with a December 1st release date for their year end lists. While I prefer to wait until the year is actually done, I get why people jump early for the clicks. Lucky for me, this goes into your inbox so ha, I win.
Of the lists that are out, most follow the same predictable patterns. I’m sure basically anyone could make a guess as to what is going to be on the Pitchfork list, and what’s already on the Consequence of Sound list. But there’s only one list that stumps me every single time, The Quietus.
In a world of clout chasing and endless trends, the Quietus is refreshingly unique. Their webpage feels like it was put together no earlier than 2006, there’s essentially nothing on their “about us” page, and they truly are there to talk about music. Most of what they’re able to do is driven by subscriptions, and their audience is filled with some of the most fervent and dedicated music fans I’ve ever seen. But what really makes them stand out is that they don’t care if you’ve ever heard of the stuff they’re listening to or putting on their lists.
The taste of whoever (or whatever group) makes their lists makes my taste look absolutely pedestrian by comparison. For example, when I go to look at the Pitchfork list I’ve often listened to, or at least heard of, every single album on the list. Sometimes one of their 50 was something that missed me, but in general it’s stuff that gets put out on major labels for a wide audience. This is normal. Having listened to, at time of writing, no less than 2170 albums this year it would be surprising for there to be a critically acclaimed major-label album that hasn’t at least made its way across my screen. The Quietus is not at all like this. The best I’ve ever done before this year is 32 albums out of their 100. It may not be the definitive list, but it’s consistently more interesting than just about anything else. Go give them a look and see if you find something cool, they’re absolutely worth your time and attention as a publication.
Once you’ve checked out the list, tell us how many albums you recognized (this year I managed to get 56, which is by far the best I’ve ever done).
Looking Out To Sea
As mentioned at the top of the letter, most artists are done releasing music for the year. But since I believe that a year begins on January 1st and ends when the clock hits midnight on December 31st, I won’t release my year end list until the year is actually done. So I’ll be keeping up with releases, but expect for this section to look pretty bare in the coming weeks.
Soilwork - A Whisp Of The Atlantic
Kelly Moran & Prurient - Chain Reaction at Dusk
Show Me A Dinosaur - Plantgazer
Non-Metal Albums
Rico Nasty - Nightmare Vacation
Your Old Droog - Dump YOD: Krutoy Edition
Com Truise - In Decay Too
Sigur Rós, Hilmar Örn Hilmarsson, Steindór Andersen and Maria Huld Markan Sigfúsdóttir - Odin’s Raven Magic
Savages - Jazzpercesek
If there’s something you’re looking forward to that I missed, drop a comment so that I know to check it out. Maybe it’ll make it onto the next newsletter, or maybe you’ll make a friend in the comment section. You never know until you try it.
Shrinekeeping
Hopefully y’all are ready for the endless lists, we’ve only got four standard newsletters left for 2020 then it’s time for a list season of my own. I’ll do my best to stay up to date in the New Year, maybe I’ll get 75 on the Quietus list next year, ah who am I kidding, probably not. If you haven’t already, share this with a friend who likes metal or silly rants. We’re rapidly closing in on our 2020 subscriber goal, which would be a sole glowing light in this hellscape of a year.
If someone shared this with you, hello, you’ve come along at a strange time. But I hope you enjoyed the strangeness you found and stick around. In fact you can click the button below to do just that.
Alright y’all, I’ve got to dive back into listmaking. Once I’m done I promise I’ll launch the nukes and we can leave this alllllllllll behind. Don’t you worry.